oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize
