It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
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