I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Randomize
