so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
