cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Also—I just realized that your wedding gift is still on my dining room table. So...as awful as I am for not yet sending it (and I still need your address), at least I didn’t bring my screaming children to potentially the most important day of your life?
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize