Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
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