That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
