The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
Randomize
