It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
either way he was missing a nipple.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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