My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
Shitshow foam night was such a success
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
Randomize
