This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
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