I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
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