i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
