im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
Randomize
