I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Randomize
