I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
i dont even know how to be here
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Boobs are out for the taking
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Randomize
