WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
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