physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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