he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
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