i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
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