Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
The free coupon that printed out with the purchase of my plan b emergency contraception was for allergy meds. I feel like a coupon for condoms would've been more fitting in this situation.
Oh wait. It's for wart remover. Fitting, afterall.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
Randomize
