Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize
