But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
