so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
Randomize
