And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
my liver is dry heaving
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
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