Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
