ugly people sure do ruin things
of course. lets lasso hookers.
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
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