do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
