Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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