Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
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