You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
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