we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
Randomize
