and you said cock pushups were impossible
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
Randomize
