just come out here and I will go home with you...
hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
it's great music for shaving your balls
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
Randomize
