I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Randomize
