I could have mohawked her pubes.
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
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