Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
We had to coat check the pizza.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
