at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
Randomize
