He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
i may or may not be watching the land before time
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
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