look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
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