How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
