That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
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