My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
Randomize
