she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Randomize