the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Randomize
