YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
it wasn't lemon gatorade
Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Randomize
