I love black thongs
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Duck Duck Cougar?
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
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