five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
