oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Randomize
