Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
